The Same Way Twice

Last month I gave birth to my 2nd Special needs child. This child, Lily, and her oldest sister, Charlotte, both were born with a rare chromosomal disorder (partial trisomy 16 and partial monosomy 9). Charlotte passed away last year at age 3 years and 8 months. Lily is now one month old.

Before Lily was born we wondered if she would look like Charlotte, if she would have the same problems, if she would survive to come home. While listing off my hopes for Lily one day, my sister in law said to me "You know, this time will be totally different. God doesn't do things the same way twice." My husband, one hard day, asked in despair "Why do we have to do this again? Didn't we learn enough the first time?" I just shook my head and remembered what my sister had said.

While waiting for Lily, I thought about her passing away immediately, which was a possibility. We planned for that outcome. We also planned for her to come home at 3 days old like Charlotte did, setting up her cradle and buying a bigger car. I did not imagine the possibility that Lily would do things totally differently. She has been in the NICU for a month now. It's different than anything we experienced with Charlotte.

How grateful I am for everything Charlotte taught us--it has made things so much easier this time. I know the language, I know the procedures. I know what problems Lily might face based on her diagnosis. I know some of the doctors! I know that it is all worth it, that if we can get Lily home with us we won't regret the weeks in the hospital, the surgeries and the stress and the tears. Not that being home will be the end of our worries, but perhaps just the beginning. But we know it will be worth it.

I'm so grateful for that knowledge. I am so grateful for my girls, all of them. And I'm grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who knows what I need, what my husband needs, and what our daughters need and will always, always provide.

For more on Lily, see www.booferd.blogspot.com

Consider the sweet, tender children
Who must suffer on this earth...
The pains of all of them he carried
From the day of his birth.
He clothes the lilies of the field,
He feeds the lambs in His fold,
And he will heal those who trust him,
And make their hearts as gold.