At times, I forget it's not just me going through this. I am not the only one who has to deal with my childs special needs. So do his siblings. I have had some pretty real conversations lately with Brody's siblings. It is hard for them. He does things they can't explain. So I came across this article and I thought it was very sound advice. Believe it or not when you have a special needs child whether you like it or not you become a special needs family. You have to adapt and talk about how it effects the whole family. This article really helped me. I hope it helps you as well.
BE OPEN AND HONEST
If you don't know the answer to your children's questions about the disability...say so and try to find the answer.
VALUE EACH CHILD INDIVIDUALLY
Point out each child's strengths and weaknesses; don't compare one with the other.
LIMIT CAREGIVING/BABYSITTING RESPONSIBILITIES
Give recognition when siblings help the special needs child. Don't choose just certain children in the family to help (i.e., the oldest girl.) Everyone can do something. Explain why you are asking for their help (i.e., "if you do this it will give me more time to do other things as well as be with you.")
BE FAIR
Treat the special needs child as normally as possible in terms of attention, discipline and resources.
ACCEPT THE DISABILITY
Others won't accept the disability if you don't. Denying it hinders siblings from being able to deal with it or adjust to it.
GET BOOKS FROM THE LIBRARY
Books are available to explain disabilities. These resources are especially helpful in explaining this subject to young children.
SOME SIBLINGS DISAGREEMENTS ARE NORMAL AND NEED TO HAPPEN
Stopping every disagreement denies the brothers and sisters the opportunity to learn to solve their own problems.
WELCOME OTHER CHILDREN AND FRIENDS INTO THE HOME
Your welcome attitude gives a model of acceptance to the siblings and friends.
PRAISE THE SIBLINGS WHEN THEY HAVE BEEN PATIENT WITH THE SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD OR SACRIFICED, OR BEEN ESPECIALLY HELPFUL.
If you don't know the answer to your children's questions about the disability...say so and try to find the answer.
VALUE EACH CHILD INDIVIDUALLY
Point out each child's strengths and weaknesses; don't compare one with the other.
LIMIT CAREGIVING/BABYSITTING RESPONSIBILITIES
Give recognition when siblings help the special needs child. Don't choose just certain children in the family to help (i.e., the oldest girl.) Everyone can do something. Explain why you are asking for their help (i.e., "if you do this it will give me more time to do other things as well as be with you.")
BE FAIR
Treat the special needs child as normally as possible in terms of attention, discipline and resources.
ACCEPT THE DISABILITY
Others won't accept the disability if you don't. Denying it hinders siblings from being able to deal with it or adjust to it.
GET BOOKS FROM THE LIBRARY
Books are available to explain disabilities. These resources are especially helpful in explaining this subject to young children.
SOME SIBLINGS DISAGREEMENTS ARE NORMAL AND NEED TO HAPPEN
Stopping every disagreement denies the brothers and sisters the opportunity to learn to solve their own problems.
WELCOME OTHER CHILDREN AND FRIENDS INTO THE HOME
Your welcome attitude gives a model of acceptance to the siblings and friends.
PRAISE THE SIBLINGS WHEN THEY HAVE BEEN PATIENT WITH THE SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD OR SACRIFICED, OR BEEN ESPECIALLY HELPFUL.
2 comments:
I really like this article, but the link doesn't seem to work for me!! Is it correct??
The link is fixed. Thanks for letting me know, Nicole!
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